A friend of mine shot me an email the other day, and in 1 part of the email he asked me this:
"how can you respond to women when they tell you they're versions? I have been getting that a few times in my gaming career and still have no clue how to reply... if I go:"Hmmm, modelling? Why did you decided to work as a model when you might have selected...?"
Models, yeah.
That is just about every guy out there is dream: dating a version. They are everywhere we look, all over us: http://query.nytimes.com/search/sitesearch/?action=click&contentCollection®ion=TopBar&WT.nav=searchWidget&module=SearchSubmit&pgtype=Homepage#/seduction newspaper and magazine advertisements, television commercials, even at the movies. Models are, in various ways, the very picture of female beauty personified in nearly every culture around the world.
But how exactly do you get a date using a model?
The fact is, most guys, when they encounter a girl they find out versions, tend to panic a bit and freeze . "Oh ," they think,"what exactly do I do? What do I say?" Something tumbles from their mouths, but isn't quite as smooth as what they had hoped it would be, and they wind up tripping over their own two feet talking to the beautiful girl with her esteemed career.
She renders.
If this seems at all familiar, well, don't worry, because it used to happen to me too. It does not anymore, and when I meet versions nowadays they even tend to get rather excited about me. And assisting you to learn how to date versions, also, is exactly what I aim to do this today.
Mistakes Guys Make Attempting to Date Designs
When I was 23 years old and fresh from school, I moved down to Washington, DC and continued the drive I'd made during my final year of college to get out a lot and learn the skills I would need to do well with girls. I hit bars, clubs, bookstores, and the street 3 to 4 days a week, nearly to the point of fatigue while attempting to balance a full-time job and hitting the gym fairly religiously.
One night not long after I'd moved to DC, I met a gorgeous girl who very soon after meeting me she danced at a movie for Beyoncé, the famous pop singer that was over the airwaves then. I panicked internally just a little bit;"Okay, stay cool,"I thought to myself,"you don't need to mess up this by behaving overly impressed or anything. Just be cool."
The thing was, she looked like she sort of liked me. But I didn't know what else to do; I had been stuck. That woman didn't seem as impressed as she had been, so I immediately changed back to the dancer.
"So, how many movies are you in?" I asked .
"Just one so far, but I'm trying out for many others," she informed me. I didn't know what else to say, and also her friend/manager soon dragged her off to another area of the bar.
I'd inadvertently made a number of those mistakes guys commonly match upon first meeting versions, dancers, flight attendants -- or some other woman (or individual ) at a position of prestige in general.
And these goofs, no matter how small they might seem in the beginning, will hang you out to dry if you are not careful.
If you want to date a model, you are going to need to curtail the following mistakes:
Acting impressed.
This one is pretty much immediate death for attraction should you do it: acting impressed or wowed or amazed by means of a woman's standing as a model (or pretty much whatever she says or does). A guy coming across as impressed tells a woman that he's out her circle; he isn't in the know; he's the complete reverse of the insider. And instantly, she believes this gulf between the two of them that's likely to be near impossible to bridge. Acting impressed is your largest no-no there is when fulfilling versions. This is just another indication of an outsider. You are going to understand a question is incorrect if you are paying attention; when it seems clunky or unwieldy or maybe not particularly savvy at all, it probably is not a fantastic question. Therefore a question like,"Oh. How do you like being a model?" While appearing quite innocent can quite quickly communicate that, exactly like the guy's who is impressed, you don't really know the first thing about models. Steer clear of clunky questions.
Returning to the subject. This is only one of those mistakes I made with this woman who danced for Beyoncé stated above. When you go back to a subject, a woman knows it is on your mind and that she knows you're impressed. Even if you acted nonplussed originally, if you bring it up again after she understands it is a big deal to you. Once the subject of her being a version was moved off of, it is important that you don't bring this up again -- and don't get too excited about the subject if she does. Really, actors do not like getting treated like celebrities (some of them enjoy the focus, accurate, but they do not wish to be treated that way by somebody they are going to mattress ). And the fact is... most versions are not celebrities! This simple truth helped me a fantastic deal back in the day -- simply because she's been at a modeling series or landed a spread in a magazine doesn't mean she's a superstar. She has a day job to pay the bills and this is merely how she brings a sense of adventure or status or prestige to her entire life. It is the way she chooses to identify herself, rather than what she actually is all of the time, so people see her as more than just an average pretty girl.In other words, it's cool that she versions... but she isn't actually a celebrity. And if you treat her , she will know you fell for her ruse -- and she'll know you don't actually get it. You can not treat women like celebrities (even if they are), or else you're instantly an outsider. You have to take care of a woman, no matter what her background or livelihood, like she is still only a girl.
You may notice the common thread linking all those points together is you want to avoid"acting like an outsider" at all costs. The man who knows how to date a model understands that versions, just like every other human being on the planet, need to be with people who understand themnot with people that are amazed by them and treat them like princesses or porcelain dolls.
To succeed with versions, as with women, you have to learn how to relate to them as people. But maybe not just as any old people; rather, as folks who you"get;" individuals that you already comprehend. That's the way you win folks over fast, and that is how you show that girl who is a model that you're the kind of guy she could wind up getting.
How to Date a Model How can you date a version?
Well, don't forget the core ideas behind avoiding those errors we talked about -- you want to keep trendy, not be impressed, and behave like an insider. Those are likely to be key to the way we go about getting to know a girl who models, and showing her that we're different from all the other men who shed their hats whenever they meet her and she lets slip what she does.
First, there are a Couple of important realizations I ought to cover, before I launch into specific measures:
She is not a celebrity. Unless you reside in Hollywood, and really even if you do, most of the"models,""dancers," and"actresses" you meet are going to be girls with limited experience that are trying it out. She may have attended one photoshoot for the first time and today she is identifying herself as a model. So don't make it a huge deal in your mind; chances are, she's only a regular woman who's had a couple of pictures shot and is trying / trying / hoping to maybe catch a rest.
She doesn't really want any"fans." No drooling fanboys need apply. She wants to meet a REAL man, who understands her for who she is, and doesn't take any overblown ideas about what she is doing with her life. She needs you to speak with her level, and not worship her -- or dismiss her.
She is trying to impress you. Ever stop and think about why she bothered to tell you she is a model? Think there's any possibility that it simply slipped out there on its own, totally unintentionally? Of course not! When a woman tells you she's a model, or a dancer, or an actress, ESPECIALLY if it isn't her entire time career and ESPECIALLY when she is not bringing in big bucks doing it, she is trying to impress you. There really is no other explanation for it than that; she wants you to be impressed. And when she wants you to be impressed, she cares what you think. And when she cares what you -- yousome stranger she's just met -- believe, odds are she probably likes you.
When you consider it, it's amazing more men do not recognize these things -- that they seem very clear, right? But they neveroccur to many men.
So a lot of talking about this stuff is pointing out the obvious that has been hiding in plain sight. If I can make you smack your head a few times and go,"Ah, of course! Why did not I see that??" That's how I know I am doing my job correctly.
Let us get onto some of the specific tactics and methods, then, you'll employ with a woman when she drops those vaunted phrases:"I am a version ."
Be curious about your phrases, uninterested in your own tone. This is actually one of those enormous, giant things I keep intending to write up a proper post on, but I never wind up getting about to. If you seem bored in your voice tone, however fascinated in your words, what you'll find is that you hit precisely the correct chord and end up getting the versions you match opening up to you quite fast. You seem like you're just making casual conversation, but are not terribly engaged -- which is far different from what women who tell people they're models are accustomed to falling.
Ask her if she does publish or runway. I received this line by my buddy David sometime back; he's a excellent, detailed post on viewing models, dancers, musicians, and flight attendants here: obstacle screening. David likes to really dive into profession here and show off his understanding of the business; I'm more of the brain to show just a little familiarity and then move quickly off the topic as I don't see it as all that helpful toward advancing the seduction. Six in 1 hand, a half dozen at the other; the outcomes will be the same. You show her, very obviously, that unlike all the other men you meet, you most definitely are NOT an outsider.
Ask her what else she does. I love this one. Ensure you show her the appropriate degree of"just enough" attention in her modeling very first; treat it like she's just told you she is a hairdresser. Then ask her what else she's doing. This communicates to her very fast that posing to you is not a big deal -- which is usually going to surprise her. She is so used to people she meets fixating on that and getting stuck on the subject or freezing and trying to run out of it, that you addressing it, then moving on, as if it's another, more ordinary matter she is mentioned, is going to jar her out of autopilot... and also make her a lot more interested about you.
Ask her when she's a living doing anything else, or when modeling pays the invoices. This is just another one that will shake her out of autopilot and make her intrigued by you and enjoying speaking to you in a hurry. She's living this glamorous life of telling people she's a version, and having them fawn over her, then YOU come across... and see right through her... rather than just realize modeling might just be her hobby, and not her livelihood, but you ASK her.You'd be surprised how many previously aloof-acting women will become little women around you when you ask them this. Their subtelne oznaki zainteresowania cover's been blown, and they've discovered a guy who really, frankly, sees them for who they are.Note: be very careful to build her back up and make her feel great after she tells you she isn't a full-time model, because you have essentially"called her out" with this one, and if you don't build up her back you strongly risk her moving into auto-rejection.
Continue with the dialogue and interaction as though she's anybody else. This one's exceptionally important. You can not treat her like she is a particular case just because somebody takes photos of her. You have to move quickly with her, and follow your procedure, and treat her the same as every other woman. That is the way you get results with versions; that is the way you get them . That is the way you date a model.
Here is how a typical conversation might go:
You: How do you invest your time?
Her: I'm a model. Printing or runway?
You: Way cool.
Congrats. You pay the bills doing that, or you're still working up for it?
Her: Oh, uh, actually I'm a paralegal. You're a killer mix then.
Her: What do you really do? Are you from here originally?
Her: Actually I'm in the South. What do you mean, an adventurer?
And now there it is. The mistakes men make that you understand now how to avoid. The mentalities you want to be sure you have going in. And the steps to follow to break her from autopilot and receive her seeing you as very different from all the other, less insightful men she meets.
Not as scary as it might've seemed earlier, eh?
Stick with this plan and you are going to be dating models, dancers, and all other manner of sought-after women with much more ease -- and a great deal less freezing and tripping over your own words -- compared to the majority of guys out there.
You will stand out. And girls who are used to guys drooling over them, well -- they will be very excited to meet a man just like you. Go and see for yourself!